This past Wednesday our family went to the Wednesday night service at our church. The message was good, I was feeling good, my husband right next to me, and my oldest daughter managed to stay awake! All was GOOD!
We all leave the sanctuary after the service. My husband goes upstairs to pick up our son and I proceed to pick up my other two daughters. As I was standing in line to sign them out, someone taps me on the shoulder and says "hey it's good to see you again." As I stare this woman in the face, my memory is a bit blurry. She proceeds to invade my personal space and gives me a hug.
Okay? (I'm a bit puzzled here)
After we all retrieve our children, we stand in the courtyard and continue talking. She brings up our upcoming 25 year highschool reunion in 2008. Okay, she's someone from highschool. She eyes my husband walking down the stairs and says "Did you guys get married?"
Uh, yes. (Everyone of my friends from high school knows that we got married)
She continuously calls me by my name, but her face is still a blurr to me. It's either I have a really bad memory or her face has become somewhat distorted over the years. As she continues to talk about people and memories here and there, I grasp on to everything she has to say. I try to somewhat have a two way conversation with her while I desperately try to put the pieces together.
Then all of a sudden, she brings up elementary school and junior high. Have I known this woman that long? She recalls the teachers we had in elementary school and junior high together. It's not until she mentions our 7th grad PE class that everything all of a sudden clicks together. She is that witch of a girl that totally harassed me throughout Jr and high school!!! Just to clarify, I don't have a bad memory, but her face has changed dramatically. I'm guessing a nose job, more prominent cheeks, kinda plastic looking and to top it off packed with make up that cracks when she smiles. No wonder I didn't recognize her right off the bat.
Okay, now I'm getting hot and my blood is boiling inside. The feelings are coming back. What I don't get is that she was talking about all these memories from the past, but did she forget that she made my school years, especially junior high, miserable?!!? Did she forget that she slammed a book on my head while she was walking up a ramp to one of her classes, or that she ripped a necklace of my neck during PE, or that she was constantly trying to turn my friends against me, or that she made fun of the way I dressed, or that she spit in my face one day in front of my friends or even that she put a dead rat hanging on my hall locker?!?!? DID SHE FORGET THESE THINGS?!?!? Everytime she did something I would turn the other cheek. Never told anyone or made a big fuss about it. Just prayed everyday that it would someday stop. She never did once apologize and now here she is talking to me like we were old buddies. The nerve of some people!!! Over the years I have forgiven her, but have not forgotten. And now those memories are brought back fresh in my mind. UGH!!!!
Okay, help me out on this one, please!!! Why is she talking to me like she never did anything wrong to me? I stood there contemplating whether I should confront her, but my whole family was around the courtyard and I didn't want to make a big scene, especially at church. Did she actually forget all those things that she has done to me? Or was she just hoping that I didn't remember anything? Why all of sudden does she want to be my friend? Is she asking for forgiveness in a round about way? Does she think that being my friend will make it all better? Did she actually have some type of amnesia that blocks out bad memories?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Finally, my husband gave a subtle hint that we should go because it's a school night. We exchange business cards and she says she'll be in touch. Oh great, why did I do that?! Now she has my number. :
My family gets in our van and I just burst into tears. My husband has no clue what is going on. I told him that was her, it was Tina, the girl who harassed me in school. He was in shock because he didn't recognize her as well.
Now what shall I do if she ever calls me? Should I just be as fake and phoney as her and pretend nothing has ever happened? After all, this happened decades ago. Or should I confront her, snap her out of her amnesia and bring her down to her knees? Should I make her relive every horrifying moment of bullying that I have encountered with her? Should I make her cringe and shrivle up as I tell her every emotion that I felt and how she made my school years miserable? Boy, I hate confrontations, but this will be eating at me now that it's fresh in my mind again. I'm not a mean person by nature, but this is bringing out the worst in me.